To set the scene, I have gained a lot of weight this year. I believe I was born in the wrong era. I should have been born in the seventeenth century. Rubens would have loved me. My figure would have been the width, sorry, height of fashion!
|Venus at the Mirror - Peter Paul Rubens|
My neighbour also left me under no illusions about my weight gain. After the barbecue party, Deserted Wife approached me at the pool. She told me how shocked she was at how much weight I had put on this year. I should stop eating desserts - as I told you earlier I had been given the job on making desserts for thirty people for the barbecue as a punishment, so I pulled out all the stops. Telling Deserted Wife I only made desserts for parties was to no avail. I was told I needed to keep exercising and stop eating until I looked like her. English Gent, sitting beside me as usual, nearly choked on his lemonade. He muttered under his breadth that she must have no mirrors in her house. One word, cellulite!!
As I said I'll try anything once. So the following Sunday I set off and we met Liz our yoga teacher. She doesn't give classes as such but is happy to show a group of friends what's what. The setting was beautiful. Class was beside the pool.
|The view from the pool.|
I really enjoyed the classes. They provided some funny moments, like when I was told to drop my chin to my chest and then breathe. Had she not taken a proper look at me? This was easy peasy for the others but I was in danger of smothering!
I could stretch but could I balance? No wonder I keep having accidents and falling over. I have no balance. The exercises had me scurrying to the nearest wall for support. And as for trying to balance sitting down holding my feet out at an angle. That gave arise to some hilarious moments.
|It looks so easy.|
|Ankara Lady had a sore back so modifies the exercise|
|Cilgin Kiz, what in the name of God are you doing???|
|Breathe, breathe, don't forget to breathe!|
|Looks slightly more graceful from this angle but my face was purple. Liz made me hold the position until she took the second photo|
I learned the following at Yoga class:
- The words for body parts in Turkish.
- My sense of balance is terrible.
- Mind is stronger than matter.
- Don't moisturize before class, it's impossible to grip body parts and hold on when smothered in aftersun.
- If at first you don't succeed try and try and try and try and try and try again.
- The support of friends is better than the support of walls.
- A belly laugh is good for the soul.
- Don't look at photos of yourself, mind is stronger than matter, you can imagine youself graceful.
- Yoga is a wonderful relaxant, if it could be bottled, someone would make a fortune.
|I even learned to stand like a drunken stork - there's a definite lean to my right!|